Meeting new people should feel safe.
Here’s what we do to keep meetups safe, what happens when something goes wrong, and the numbers to check us by.
The numbers come straight from our records. Each one says exactly what it counts, and we only publish it once enough cases are behind it that nobody can be identified.
How we keep meetups safe
No single feature makes meeting strangers safe. These work together, from before you sign up for a group to after you’ve met.
Verified persons
A short selfie check, in a pose we ask for, that a moderator compares with the profile photos. It shows there’s a real person behind a profile, not who they are or that they’re safe. The selfie is deleted 30 days after the review.
Groups first, in public places
You meet new people in small groups, not alone with a stranger. First meetings are at a café, a park, a museum or another public place. The app doesn’t accept a home address for a first meeting.
Names hidden until it’s happening
While a group is forming, you see how many people said yes, not who they are. Names appear once the group is confirmed, and then only first names.
Private feedback after every meetup
After each meetup we ask how it went. Nobody else sees your answers. If something felt off, you can tell us right there, about someone or about the place.
People review every report
Reports and safety flags go to moderators, who look at what happened and decide what to do: hide a message, remove someone from a group, or keep two people apart for good.
Women-only circlesComing soon
Circles only women, or women and non-binary people, can join, where every member is a verified person. You opt in to see them. We go by how you describe yourself and never ask for proof of gender.
The numbers
How many people are verified, how many meetups happen and where, and how quickly reports get a decision. Counted by the server, not picked by us.
Loading the numbers…
Not enough data yet means fewer cases than the threshold, not zero. We’d rather show nothing than a number that could point at a person.
If something happens
You can leave any meetup at any time, and you never owe anyone an explanation. Then tell us, so we can act.
In an emergency, call first.
If you’re in danger, don’t wait for the app. In Germany:
Free and anonymous, around the clock:
- 116 016Violence against women helpline, in many languages
- 0800 111 0 111TelefonSeelsorge, if you need to talk
How to report in the app
- In a chat: open the menu at the top and choose Report, Unmatch or Block.
- In a group: open the group’s menu and choose “Something felt unsafe”, or report a member or a single message.
- On a hosted group: choose “Report this group” at the bottom of its details.
- After a meetup: tell us in the private feedback, about a person or the place.
What happens next
- Straight away, you and the person you reported won’t be introduced or put in a group together again. A reported message is hidden while we look at it.
- Your report is private. The other person isn’t told who reported them.
- A moderator reviews what happened and decides: remove a message, take someone out of a group, keep you apart for good, or no action if nothing broke our rules.
- How quickly that happens is in the numbers above: measured, not promised.
What we never do
No live location
Nobody can see where you are right now, and that includes us. We don’t track your location in the background.
No selling your data
We don’t sell personal data, and we don’t share it with advertisers.
No ratings of people
There are no stars or scores that rate a person for others to see. Feedback after a meetup stays private.
Meet people in small groups, in places you’d go anyway.
Tell ShouldHaveMet about your week. We’ll look for people and plans that fit it.